Here's one I wish there was a picture for but I can't find one. Gerald Mason called the Worth County Sheriff’s Department to say he was going to drive himself to the emergency room.
Mason told authorities he was working in his yard in Joice when the injury occured. While attempting to push a tree over with his tractor, he said the tree came back and fell on top of him.

“A small branch penetrated his head,” said Lt. William Hon, commander of the State Patrol Post 8. “It was between his left ear and left eye, right along his hair line. “The branch remained inserted in his head. It was broke off at the skinline, like a splinter.”

Looks like the cops intercepted him but he didn't want to pull over right away. Finally he did and they got him an ambulance. Probably didn't want to pay for it, who would? Just because you have a tree branch stuck in your head doesn't mean you can't drive.

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I remember back to when I was 23 and for some reason I never ever remember thinking I was Jesus Christ and I certainly would have never told a cop that I was. Levi Zachary Humphrey was celebrating his 23rd birthday in the water off Marco Island when he decided to spit on a corporal and tell him he was Jesus Christ. His party ended in two convictions. Oh, he was buck naked at the time just to make things interesting.

The cops found him naked, drunk, splashing in the water and yelling at himself. The took him out of the water where he refused to give his name. He told them he was Jesus and spit on the officers. Imagine this though, his finger prints showed that he was already in the system and that he was really Humphrey of 841 S.W. Third Ave. N., Golden Gate, and had a criminal record. Can you believe it? He was charged with battery on a law enforcement officer and providing a false name to law enforcement. 

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I love the good old usa, they put pictures and names of everybody in public. Take a look at this 16 year old loser name Aaron Scott from Goldsboro, NC. He allegedly broke into the home of Ron and Barbara Watson when the were on a business trip and turned it into a crack house. He was found sleeping in their bed when they came home.

Some of damage includes, the house trashed with piles of broken bottles, matches, guns, ammunition and human feces. There were hundreds of chicken bones all over the house. Both the toilets were stopped up with chicken bones," Ron Watson said. "They must have had a smoke fire in here or a grease fire, because there was soot all over the place." Not to mention there were crack cocaine vials everywhere. Human feces, why would anybody break into a house and party in their own crap, litteraly? I never get that one. They also stole everything, shocker that crackheads would do something like.

Aaron Scott Everett, 16, is charged with felony breaking and entering, larceny and possession of stolen property. Deputies said that they are continuing to investigate and that more arrests are likely.

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I was reading an article that Luke Perry was really wanted to play Dylan McKay on the new 90210. Well, what the hell else would he be doing? I looked at this IMB Profile and trust me, he has plenty of time on his hands to make another bad series. It's not like he has been shooting the lights out Paul Newman style or even Pauly Shore style for that matter. And take a look at those big old forehead and crows feet. If he was 30 something playing a 19 year old why couldn't he mid-40's playing a late 20 something. I know lots of guys in the late 20's that look that have a huge parking space on their forhead like that. He's looking perfect for cheese tv.

The new show looks great. Here were is a quote from one of the shakespearean thespians playing in the new series. Do people still talk like that? Don't miss this show it's going to be a good one.

"Oh. My. God. I love Dylan McKay," Shenae Grimes, who plays Annie Wilson on the new 90210, says in Nylon magazine.

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When I found this picture I just had to share. Made me laugh out loud. It's the Nut Busting Doritos Bag. It came from the  Suupaa Pop - Package Design from Japan, an exhibit at the AIGA National Design Gallery in New York two years ago. I found it googling around, as always.

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So I picked up Tiger Woods 09 for the XBox360 yesterday and am having some great fun playing it. Tiger Woods 08 was terrible, full of bugs and online play was so slow it was obscene. Anyways, some guy put out a  video on YouTube that Tiger could walk on water and par out from his shot on the pond. EA counter released a video which shows that Tiger is just that good. Give it a watch, it's great. 

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I was looking through Google Images at some celeb pictures and came across this abomination of a photo. I have never seen things like this in my worst nightmares as a kid.  Can you find a more god awful picture of a human being than this? I honestly thought it was a tranny beating up somebody when I first saw it or a really spaced out picture of Steven Tyler. Either way not very flattering for a lady. Well Amy, don't worry you won't be making the cover of People for the most beautiful people. I imagine the rate you are carrying on the next time you are on the cover the story will be about your life….

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So, I just wasted an 123 minutes of my time wathing 21. The movie trailers descbribe "21" is the fact-based story about six MIT students who were trained to become experts in card counting and subsequently took Vegas casinos for millions in winnings. I read a review on another website that said the movie was about as exciting as counting cards. Pretty much nailed it on the head. There was some eye candy but 6 superstar genius types that don't know enough to mix up their signals when counting cards in the same casinos over and over again. Please, I'm not even that smart and I could figure out that at some point you would have to change your signals. I didn't even get the fact that they all flew in and stayed together at the same place and met in the same room but they were undercover trying to take the casinos for money. Dumb. If you are bored and tired of watching Malcom in the Middle on Fox for the 400 billionth time then I guess it will do in a pinch.

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I love this piece not only because these two guys think that they are ninjas doing the work of Jesus but they are also adults, 19 and 20. God love them.

Cops approached a car parked in the left lane of Route 46 east and found two Clifton men dressed in black claiming to be Ninjas. The men were wearing tactical vests and armed with knives in sheaths at their waists along with Ninja throwing knives, Chinese throwing stars, four-pointed tacks, swords, bows and arrows and nunchucks, said Detective Capt. Robert Rowan.
 
Jesse Trojaniak, 19, and Tadieusz Tertkiewicz, 20, told police they were “modern day Ninjas” also called Shinobi Warriors on their way to deliver warning letters to known drug dealers and drug users to stop their “impure” activities.

You can read the rest of the story at The Source, you have to love two heavily armed men taking down the drug cartels because they think they are ninjas. Love Jersey news.

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When I featured the story of the loser calling 911 because he didn't have sauce on his sub I thought how low can you go. Well we another Barely Hanging On award for a stupid 911 call. Enter Kadien Jackson, 21, of Blauvelt, N.Y. This superstar called 911 and told them he had been robbed at a Route 4 gas station in Englewood. He called again moments later with a description of the robber. When officers arrived they found that the description fit an employee at the gas station who, the caller said, wouldn't give him a refund on an unused box of condoms. He wanted his condom money back, maybe he bought the large ones by mistake. Smooth move Kadien, you have been charged with making a false report, a crime that carries prison time upon conviction.

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