I don't know where my phone number ended up but it's been phone call after phone call from telemarketers or id theft people with promises of cheap auto insurance quotes. Thank god I have a phone that can block a ton of numbers. It's rings half a ring then hangs up them, giving them a busy signal. Without it, I would be going off the wall and seriously thinking about unplugging my phone.

Obviously Geico isn't one of those bottom feeders calling my house but the picture is funny all the same.

I am at least hope that there is lawn bowling, darts or something interesting on the old tube instead of having to watch the probowl. I can't think of a more useless, unncessary sporting event. Oh wait, I almost forgot about the NHL Allstar game. It's about as exciting as getting kicked in the head. You don't need to be a Oklahoma City lawyer to figure out that even the players don't want to go and play. How many of them have been scratched this week for not showing up to meetings and practices?  I'll take the Lingerie Bowl any day of the week.

Back in December I reported about Teachers Alini Brito, Cindy Mauro Caught Naked in Classroom at James Madison High School in Brooklyn. Since that time I have read that both were fired. I guess the school looks down on two naked teachers allegedly engaged in lesbian action.

I even missed two stories. One about another teacher allegedly carrying on a relationship with a student and allegations about the vice principle and sexual harrassment. You can read more about these storeies at the Source.

The latest scandal involves Madison High gym teacher Lisa Guttilla, 37, who was arrested Friday for feeling up a 14-year-old girl, police sources said. The abuse came to light when the teen's mother started asking questions about a hickey on her neck – and she confessed to sexy sessions with Guttilla between Jan. 4 and 9. A complaint filed in Brooklyn Criminal Court says the teacher did "touch, grab, squeeze and kiss the [girl] about the breast and buttock." Guttilla was charged with sexual abuse and child endangerment and sent to the "rubber room" – a reassignment center for teachers under investigation.

And we have to endure Beverly Hills 90210 when there are "real" schools like this out there.

As if getting insurance quotes isn't painful enough. Now you have to add the most annoying person on the face of the planet into the equation. Can you imagine having to live with a person like this in real life? There are people like this that exist in the real world. Scary.

Just fair warning, as I write this out D Day is only about 17 days and 6 hours away. That should give you plenty of time to find some unique gifts for her. But then again if you are like me you will be leaving things to the last minute, going to a corner store and buying flowers and doing a fancy dinner out. Don't do what I do. It never gets me anywhere. Go out ahead of time and put some thought into what you are going to do on Valentines Day. It may score you points later on down the road. Remember, the golf courses will be opening soon enough. You know what I mean.

The news today was that Pope John Paul II flagellated himself regularly to imitate Christ’s suffering. No he wasn't gassy on purpose if that's what you were thinking. It means he was into whipping himself with a belt so he could be close to Jesus. Read more at the Source.

Flagellation can be a timely process. It takes a ton of time to whip yourself into the favour of Jesus everyday. I found this handy little device on line to help out whip yourself all day long. It's called the Hands-Free Self-Flagellation. It seems to be highly recommended.

According to Sister Kristina of St. Augustine's Church in Vancouver, Canada: "We share one Flagellator among a dozen of us here and let me tell you, it gets a work out".

The goofy things you find playing around in google. I was looking at a series of industrial hand wheels when I found some very large sized wheels. Actually it was a tank built in 1914. You can see a man standing on top of it to the left and a man on the ground. This beast weighed 40 tons, it's wheels were 9 meters in diameter and oddly enough it got stuck on a small ditch on its first run. It was too big a target for the enemy and it was melted down by 1916.

Last week I cracked my lcd monitor. I don't want to get into the specifics but I am basically an idiot and we will leave it at that. I have been using now for the week and thought to myself. Is there anything leaking out this hole? Am I going to grow an extra toe or have a couple of fingers fall off? I could end up like the swamp thing by the end of the month. Thinking that I want to have children someday I think I better stop using it and go back to my old monitor.