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• Most of the diamonds in the world are used for industrial purposes and not for getting your girlfriend off of your back.
• Less than 1% of women will ever wear a diamond that is one carat or more, my woman being one of them.
• In ancient times diamonds were seen as signs of strength, courage and invincibility.
• Archduke Maximilian of Austria was the first person to give a diamond engagement ring, to Mary of Burgundy in 1477. Blame him.
• The largest Diamond ever found was the Cullinan at 3,106 carats.
• Diamonds can withstand extremely high temperatures so they used in windows on space ships.
• In India, around one million people are employed because of diamond industry, the rest of them answer the phone when my cable goes out.

1327: Edward II of England, after being deposed and imprisoned by his Queen consort Isabella and her lover Roger Mortimer, was rumored to have been murdered by having a red-hot iron inserted into his anus.^[20]

1601: Tycho Brahe, according to legend, died of complications resulting from a strained bladder at a banquet. It would have been extremely bad etiquette to leave the table before the meal was finished, so he stayed until he became fatally ill. This version of events has since been brought into question as other causes of death (murder by Johannes Kepler, suicide, and mercury poisoning among others) have come to the fore.^[27]

1753: Professor Georg Wilhelm Richmann, of Saint Petersburg, Russia, became the first recorded person to be killed while performing electrical experiments when he was struck and killed by a globe of ball lightning. ^[35]

1814: London Beer Flood, 9 people were killed when 323,000 imperial gallons (1 468 000 L) of beer in the Meux and Company Brewery burst out of their vats and gushed into the streets.

1963: Thích Qu?ng ??c, a Vietnamese Buddhist monk, sat down in the middle of a busy intersection in Saigon, covered himself in gasoline, and lit himself on fire, burning himself to death. ??c was protesting President Ngô ?ình Di?m's administration for oppressing the Buddhist religion.^[76]

Topp 10 Failed Mcdonalds Products

An ostrich's eye is bigger than it's brain.

A mole can dig a tunnel 300 feet long in just one night

A cockroach can live several weeks with its head cut off – it dies from starvation

A crocodile always grows new teeth to replace the old teeth

A hedgehog's heart beats 300 times a minute on average

A hippo can open its mouth wide enough to fit a 4 foot tall child inside

A hummingbird weighs less than a penny

Bulls are color blind, therefore will usually charge at a matador's waving cape no matter what color it is — be it red or neon yellow

Camels have three eyelids to protect themselves from blowing sand

Cat urine glows under a black-light

Dogs and cats, like humans, are either right or left handed… or is that paws?

Porcupines float in water

The sloth (a mammal) moves so slowly that green algae can grow undisturbed on its fur

A dragonfly has a lifespan of twenty-four hours.

A duck's quack doesn't echo. No one knows why.

A female ferret will die if it goes into heat and cannot find a mate.

A lion's roar can be heard from five miles away. A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.

A rat can last longer without water than a camel.

A rhinoceros' horn is made of compacted hair. Crickets hear through their knees.

Crocodiles swallow stones to help them dive deeper.

Hummingbirds can't walk.

If you feed a seagull Alka-Seltzer, its stomach will explode.

Iguanas, koalas and Komodo dragons all have two penisesMore people are killed each year from bees than from snakes. Only female mosquitoes bite.

Orcas (killer whales) kill sharks by torpedoing up into the shark's stomach from underneath, causing the shark to explode.

Polar bear fur is not white, it's clear

April Fools Day History and Fun Facts

The Top 100 April Fool's Day Hoaxes of All Time

Snopes April Fools Day Origins

The Fools Day

Here's a YouTube Video of a guy peeing his pants.

1. Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

2. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

3. There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

4. The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

5. A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

6. There are more chickens than people in the world.

7. Two-thirds of the world's eggplant is grown in New Jersey.

8. The longest one-syllable word in the English language is "screeched."

9. On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag.

10. All of the clocks in the movie "Pulp Fiction" are stuck on 4:20.

11. No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.

12. "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".

13. All 50 States are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.

14. Almonds are a member of the peach family.

15. Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

16. Maine is the only State whose name is just one syllable.

17. There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.

18. The characters "Bert" and "Ernie" on Sesame Street were named after "Bert the cop" and "Ernie the taxi driver" in Frank Capra's "It's a Wonderful Life."

19. A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

20. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

21. Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.

22. In most advertisements, the time displayed on a watch is 10:10.

23. Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.

24. Los Angeles' full name is "El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de los Angeles de Porciuncula."

25. A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

26. A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.

27. A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.

28. It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

29. The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world.

30. In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak.

31. The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

32. Mr. Rogers is an ordained minister.

33. The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.

34. There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.

35. "Stewardesses" is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand.