Tags: offbeat news
, Public Masturbation
, public nudity
It must be the weather that brings all the winners out. I have never seen so many public nudity stories than I have over the past two weeks. Here are a few more that have come my way.
Lincoln, NE - Enter 19 year old Sando Hamilton, caught wandering in a public park totally nude. When caught by police he told them he was mugged and when he had no money the robber took all of his clothes instead. He later admitted that he was hot so he got in the bugg and walked around the park. When he came back to get his clothes they were gone. Hamilton was charged with making a false statement and indecent exposure. I don`t know why he just didn`t take out his wizard stick and conjure up some new clothes.
ELKHART – A 51-year-old Mishawaka man was arrested over the weekend after an off-duty police officer said he saw him walking around a crowded Rice Cemetery in the buff. When he saw the cop he took off but they tracked him down through his car tag. He told the officer he went to the cemetery to check on his in-laws’ grave. He said he had been golfing in Middlebury all day, and after getting back in the truck from visiting the grave, he took off his underwear because they were wet. While driving in the cemetery, the suspect said he saw some flowers he wanted to look at. Because he did not have his glasses on, he got out of his truck — naked — to get a closer look, he told police. He was arrested for public nudity.
San Antonio, TX – Evan Zuleger, 18, is facing charges of aggravated assault an an officer but that is not what makes the story interesting. A police offices caught Evan and his girlfriend naked in his car. When the officer flashed his lights Evan jumped behind the wheel, tried to run the officer over and then crashed his car into a pole. He then fled the scene in the buff. He also left his naked girlfriend behind. She was all too happy to hand his name over to police. Pretty happy looking guy, lost his car, his woman, his clothes and his mind.
San Mateo – A man wearing nothing but tennis shoes was with a bean bag gun and arrested for indecent exposure after two complaints of a large naked man ringing doorbells in a neighbourhood. Deputies chased Peter Allen Steele, 38, on Saturday after responding to two reports in Woodside and Portola Valley of a 6-foot-7-inch, 250-pound man ringing a doorbell and standing naked in a doorway. The man, later identified as Steele was taken to the hospital where staff there said he was observed masturbating on the gurney. A search of his car turned up a sex toy in the form of rubber female genitalia. Steele was charged with two counts of indecent exposure, driving while under the influence, resisting arrest, trespassing, vandalism and fleeing a peace officer. Where is a picture when you need one?